A-B-C's & 1, 2, 3's

Schooling choice is a BIG deal for many parents. This was as true when I first anticipated sending my oldest child off to school (1995) as it is now.  Considering carefully one’s various choices and the factors and priorities in making the decision is part of the stewardship of being a parent.

Since the topic, with its resulting questions, has been brought to me again recently by others, I’d like to share our journey in this post. 

First: several qualifiers:

1. This is OUR family’s journey.  I do not intend nor imply the description of what we did to be a prescription for another. 
2. This post is MY opinion and OUR process of discernment, so I fully expect and accept others’ disagreement or differing opinions, ideas, and determinations.  
3. Schooling choice is not a moral (right/wrong) issue, but a wisdom issue.  In this context, we can agree to disagree without criticism, disunity, or any lack of charitableness. 

     

I’d like to discuss this in two parts:

• Primary factors in our own schooling choice for our four children
• Considerations I’d put forward for any in this parenting decision

Factors in the Pratt Schooling Choice:

HISTORY: Our four children began in a Christian School at kindergarten, some of the four attending 2 different schools until 5^th grade.   This was largely due to our setting and our background, both Jon and I having graduated from Christian schools.  And we wanted our children to be taught in a Christian setting by Christian instructors.  Many of these years we received tuition discounts or scholarships because of Jon’s ministry status.  In one setting,  our children’s education was at no cost to us.

PRESENT LOCATION: When moving to Minnesota (2000), we continued our elementary year practice and enrolled our 3 children (and niece who lived with us) in a Christian school (not connected to our church.) Soon our 4^th child was added, starting kindergarten.

As our oldest approached middle school,  and we looked forward, our thinking began to shift. 

·         Our evaluation of our Christian school: weak.  What seemed strong at the elementary level dipped sharply in middle and high school: limited resources and faculty-stretched-thin, spiritual emphases in areas we sharply disagreed with, an inadequate and often inferior education.   (Lots of wonderful people doing their best, please understand.  But grossly unequipped for such a task).

·         Our consideration of homeschool:  limited. We felt the price too high; the weaknesses too strong

1.  High Price: Home-school  required 100% focus and would limit many other endeavors. To do this well would mean cutting off or severely limiting many other priorities we valued including church & people investment, house & family focus (other than schooling), Jon’s freedom to minister in his vocation (as he’d have had to take active, ongoing direction & involvement in our home-schooling)
2. Weaknesses. Home school presented imbalance with which we weren’t comfortable.  Educationally. Socially. Spiritually. Our children’s identity & development.  It  seemed an overly family-centered orientation that didn’t mesh well with our other life priorities.  We didn’t want homeschooling to hijack our family, even unintentionally.  But we couldn’t perceive in reality how such a large enterprise could do anything but. 

·         Our look at public education: new openness. With our children grounded in God’s truth,  our ongoing immersion in church community & consistent teaching, and a strong commitment to ongoing family training AND open conversation with our children, we looked at our local public school:

1. We found educational excellence (not perfection, but solid trained teachers, facilities and programs) with many opportunities in the arts, sports, science, post-secondary options, accelerated courses, remedial help
2. We found educators to be reasonable to concerns and respectful to our beliefs
3. We anticipated our kids being made to think, to stand up for what they believe, to figure out what they did believe, to feel the price of being unpopular, to have their faith tested.
4. We anticipated them experiencing secular culture firsthand, yet since they were still in our home, their responses and challenges could be discussed and guided by us, as parents.
5. We observed and talked with others in our church who had made the public school choice. Indeed, we had a strong support system of godly individuals in our church from whom we were able to benefit, as we thought through pros and cons. 

Evaluation: Three of our four kids have graduated from Lakeville Public Schools, with our youngest starting his senior year there this fall.

Succinctly:

• Each child’s education has reflected their individual drives, interests, and academic levels. All have been given solid opportunity to excel, experienced diverse and rigorous courses, had mostly knowledgeable and capable instructors, and have graduated with a depth of learning, gained inside the classroom and out.
• Spiritually they’ve been exposed to temptations: I’ve observed the inward influences of pride, worldly pleasure allurements, secular, liberal leanings on social and political issues, and the God-absent lifestyles of friends’ families and homes.  But they’ve seen the emptiness of these, we’ve talked through the brokenness and falsehood, and they’ve witnessed up close the folly of life done apart from God. 
• There’ve been the outward displays: the homosexual classmate, the immoral sexual promiscuity by some, the party crowd, drugs and alcohol are available for those who would seek it out.
• But this is the world we live in, as salt & light, and we desire they navigate through it wisely, not hide from it or naively be ignorant of it.  We pray robustly that the holiness of God sets them apart.
• Through all of this, persistent church involvement and family interaction saturated them in the teaching of God’s Word. 

Considerations for all in the

 Decision-Making Process:

           

Kingdom of God Living

1.       Keep important things (the kingdom of your family) subordinate to ultimate things (the kingdom of God).  Don’t confuse the two.  Do we sacrifice impact and opportunity in the kingdom of God (larger community & church) to procure our educational preference in the kingdom of our own home?

2.       Remember that the King is in charge of your children: He saves souls and changes hearts by drawing them to Himself.  (It does not depend on you, for good or bad.)

3.       Know your role in the above process:  it is faithful parenting and the modeling and teaching of God’s truth.   If one thing we do should be emphasized,  it is prayer (see #2)

Unity vs. Divisiveness in the Body of Christ

1.       The Bible’s counsel to parents is clear, but limited and non-specific in how to live it out. In contrast, the Bible’s teaching on the Body of Christ (church) fills most of the New Testament.   In this instruction there is repeated emphasis on the unity of the body of believers.

2.       Schooling choice should be kept in its rightful place: a small level issue in the family of God.  Keep it this way by allowing individual families to each make their own choice without reproach.

3.       Unity around the gospel should be a top level issue.  Keep it this way by rallying around the themes it proclaims: mutual love and submission, patience, thinking of others’ needs above your own, humility, the urgency of spreading the gospel!  Create an atmosphere of respect and acceptance to all, whatever their schooling choice.

Motivations for Schooling Choice:  Are they valid? Is each equally important?

1.       Quality education (this is a discussion about schooling choice; it should be a substantial factor). Not all settings or every individual is adequately equipped/able to provide quality education.

2.       Character development:  habits, integrity, skills, abilities, submission, flexibility.   Character is taught, caught, and developed within the furnace of difficulty and resistance.

3.       Spiritual Influence:  How do I best live out Deuteronomy 6:6-7 in balance with the other commands of Scripture?   Is schooling about his soul….or about his education? And which one do I have control over?  Education is an earthly pursuit; it is not an eternal one. 

4.       Fear and insisting on control over all my child’s world often lurk below the surface in parenting decisions.  But a “mama bear” complex can sidestep our Father God’s role. He is the one in whom we place our child’s well-being, not our own determinations.  Is fear a factor? Do you insist on controlling all things, done your way?

For those who desire a comprehensive comparison: