Hidden Hurts and Silent Sorrows

It was a training video put out by a fast-food chain.  I remember it clearly, even though I viewed it years ago, and I can’t recall if it was Wendy’s or KFC.  But the point was profound, and it left its message strongly imprinted on my memory.

It showed the restaurant on an average day.

The dining room was filled with people, all enjoying their mid-week meal.  Various ages, individuals, couples and families sat around the tables

• A grandma with her 2 grandsons
• A young mom with 3 kids under 6
• An older couple sharing one burger and 2
         cups of water.
• A wrinkled man with distracted eyes.
• A smiling-eyed woman with a colorful scarf.
• A teen sitting in the corner, plugged in, food
        wrappers askew.


What made it remarkable was what happened next.  Above each person, one by one,  appeared a word bubble, and in each was described the significant circumstance of their life that week:
• Grandma got news of her glaucoma’s progression, leaving her on a countdown to blindness. How long would I continue to enjoy outings with my grandsons?!
• The young mom worried -how soon would her husband find work after his job ended that day? How will we pay the bills?!
• The older couple heard from their daughter on the East Coast: “Can’t come for Thanksgiving”  Again we’ll be alone! As they’d been for Easter, and last Christmas
• The wrinkled man had no news in his day. He was all alone today. As he is every day.
• The smiling-eyed woman was glad for the 5 day reprieve before her next round of chemo.  This is the time she felt almost alive again, even if my hairless scalp & drying skin tries to convince me otherwise!
• And the teen? He was eating alone again, because mom was working, and dad…well, I wonder where  dad had gone all those years ago!?

The point of the video? Everyone has an individual story, and for many, that story involves a burden that most know nothing about.  And so a smile, a kind word, a thoughtful gesture…these can make a difference.  And so the company encouraged its workers to look past the “plain” people to offer personal kindness & courtesy. You never know how you may impact another’s world with simple kindness.

The parallel I draw is to the community of faith.

For many who smile and walk past you on a Sunday morning, there is a burden that is quietly carried or a sorrow that is silently born.   Even those who laugh with you about the trivial, or who ask you about your job/family/health,  or who converse about the commonplace as you stand across from her.

It may be that her life has a place that is hurting, broken, straining, mourning,  frazzled,  hard.
For some, excruciating.

Yet, she asks God for help, gets out the door, and moves forward.

If you perused a crowd on Sunday morning,  and info bubbles about another’s burdens and heartaches were made known, would it impact you?
Because the bubbles are non-existent, but the hidden hurts & silent sorrows are not.
You never know how you may impact another’s world with simple kindness, interest, or compassion.

But now, you know.

What Comes Most Easily

Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire, he breaks out against all sound judgment. 
Prov 18:1

On the first day of our Ladies’ Bible study whose focus was “Community”, I read this verse in the regular course of my reading schedule.

I smiled at its timeliness.

It says it well, doesn’t it?
And then I cringed as I realized it speaks against the natural tendency of all of us--
Withdrawal. Keeping to ourselves. Hiding. (Though we wouldn’t call it that.)

I suppose one could psychologize for paragraphs on why this is.
One could theologize throughout the pages of Scripture on why this is.
But….my simple thought for this post…to myself and all of us:

Follow the sound judgment of this Proverb to resist this tendency:

Instead, plunge into the mainstream of “Body Life” (Rom 12/I Cor 12). Take steps toward others, toward active involvement, toward transparency and trust.  Trust God to take the risk.

We do this to the joy of our own soul and the encouragement of others.  God’s wise counsel is to get involved in the gathering of group body life AND in individual relationship with others.

Instead of sputtering, struggling-- then eventual settling-- in the murky waters of alone-ness.
(Can’t you remember the counsel of your mom  when you were a child? “Don’t swim alone”)

Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire, he breaks out against all sound judgement. 
Prov 18:1

Encouragement in Trial

“For it has been granted to you that for the sake of Christ you should not only believe in him but also suffer for his sake…” Philippians 1:29
Suffering is a reality for all believers. Trials for me have been most commonly inward and private, rather than outward and circumstantial. I might desire to tell of my sufferings for the cause of Christ, in the face of sharing the gospel. But, this has not been God’s call for me…so far.
And although some struggles for me may have been brought on by situations or perceived wrongs by others, even these have, for me, resulted most powerfully in inward struggles as I deal with their implications in my heart and mind.
For when hardship enters, so struts in Satan with his temptation pad and pen in hand.
His strategies are dangerous and far reaching.
In my experience Satan has attempted to use the difficulty of personal suffering to tempt me to:
~Doubt God’s goodness
~Doubt God’s control
~Doubt my salvation
~Doubt Christ’s power over sin, mine or another’s
And on a more personal level, to
~Doubt my ability or worthiness to serve God
~Doubt my marriage’s ‘rightness’
~Doubt I’m in the ‘right kind of church’
~Doubt the leadership he’s placed in my life

I’m thankful the Holy Spirit is alive & well in this regenerated heart. He raises the red flag and waves vehemently at each of these insidious falsehoods.
And then He proceeds to engage me in preaching to myself God’s truth.
Want to hear the three points of my sermon?
(Warning: this could cause you to respond in praise-filled worship! Feel free to say a hearty ‘Amen’ at any part of this sermon! )

1. God is always, ever, and most perfectly in loving control of all things.Personalize that to your current trial. Pronounce and ponder each word in relationship to your situation….always…ever…perfectly…loving…control.
No matter how hard the path, how painful the journey, how weak I am, how bleak the situation seems from my perspective, GOD IS THERE IN LOVE & POWER!

2., His ultimate goal is the same as mine – the sanctification of my life to bring Him glory. In my trial, I remind myself this is really what I want: His glory. And so my comfort or health or happiness (or that of others I love) is not what is most important. The circumstance which is causing me so much trouble, the private struggle that I bear alone in ongoing pain; this is but a tool in His hand to conform me more to His image that He may shine more brightly. He is doing this. And if more of His glory can be known by trial than by ease, How can I not respond, BRING IT ON, GOD. YOUR GLORY COUNTS THE MOST!

3. He sees the whole parade. (Sorry, borrowed this imagery from a favorite song.). My perspective on what is going on is so limited. Like a single bystander in a miles-long parade. Sure, a handsome stallion may be right in front of me taking a dump, but that is not what is going on in the whole parade! From the robust, energetic start of the marching band’s leader to the culmination in royalty of the king & queen’s majestic coronation aboard the last stunning float, the grand parade is marching to its majestic purpose and single drumbeat. God sees the whole parade, directing its every nuance and overarching theme all at once. I do not. Take a read of Psalm 90 to see God’s resume’!

“Lord, you have been our dwelling place in all generations. Before the mountains were brought forth, or ever you had formed the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting, YOU ARE GOD!”
And so I preach to myself one of several sermons I keep handy when times of discouragement, trial, doubt and weakness set in. And it’s kind of funny, because as I close with the final ‘Amen’ to this message, Satan is nowhere to be found.
I guess this kind of sermon is not his forte’

Thank you, God, for the faithfulness of your Truth in times of trial.

Lord, I am so weak in these times of frequent darkness and struggle. I plead for your mercy to keep me faithful, to preserve me, to make my heart burn most and hottest for you, as I am so quick to falter. Grant this, I pray, in demonstration of your faithfulness and power. Amen