The Right Formula

I’m so glad God doesn’t love me according to a formula.

I’ve been challenged recently in 2 different places about the shortcomings of formulas and lists, of ‘one-size-fits-all’ kinds of answers or systems.

One was in the context of parenting, as blogger Wendy Alsup addressed the individuality of children’s needs and how the popularity of ‘first time obedience’ as put forward in many parenting books, can in some situations miss the mark and display a lack of grace.  She then says, “Thank You, Lord, for Your mercy with me when I don't at first obey and for showing me a better way to love my son as You love me!“  (See the whole article here for context.)

The second was in a book on prayer I’m reading.  (HUGE blessing—great book!)  In A Praying Life, Paul Miller addresses the common A-C-T-S formula for prayer/bible reading (Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, Supplication).  His point was not that it is wrong or necessarily unhelpful , just that it is not meant to stand alone as a formula which becomes rote,  so that it would desensitize one to God as a person.  He muses, “When I come home, I don’t first Adore Jill (his wife) for a couple of minutes, Confess my failure to take out the garbage that morning, Thank her for making dinner, and then give her my list….none of us want to be treated like robots…including God. He is, after all, a person.” (bold/underline emphasis mine).

(Smile with me to imagine the above scenario in your home!)

Now we know that there are, indeed, some ABSOLUTES.  Some ‘formulas’ that are fixed.  The gospel is inflexible and in one sense, a very ‘one size ONLY fits all’ formula of rescue and provision.  We dare not alter or try to adjust clear statements of God’s truth to our preferences, experiences, or human reasoning. 

Even in the above two examples I cited, the ‘formulas’ questioned are of merit when utilized in the right spirit and appropriate circumstances.   Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater!

The point to note here, however, is that our natural tendency to want to rest in a single formula or “10 principles to follow to be a good XXXXX” is misplaced.

And God would direct us differently.  Away from human wisdom,  from self dependence, from temporal solution or strategy.

 God points us instead to a Person. 

Indeed, the surest way I can be a godly mother, faithful wife, obedient follower of God, student of Scripture, or any other role I’m called upon is not by mastering a different formula for each one, focusing on the practical application in my task.  (And learning in each of these, along with accountability and obedience is not to be thrown out.  It is simply not where I begin, nor in what I rest.)

But instead to begin with a single “formula” for all of them.  

Pursue God.

 Singularily.  Purposely.  Passionately.  In intimate, close relationship.

“Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you.”  James 4:8

“Abide in me, and I in you

.As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.”  John 15:4-5

And it is of curious interest to me that as I enjoy how God individually relates with me that I start to release my clenching grasp of ‘how to’ lists and formula remedies to instead reach my hand out to simply grasp His. 

And with my gaze on Him, I then seek out all kinds of ways to grow to know Him better. 

Sometimes through a new 'system' to help my weak heart, undisciplined mind, and straying affections keep focus. 

(After all, my husband would be in the doghouse without a calendar to remind him of the special days that he brings to the forefront in his love for me. It is a kind of 'structure' to help him do what is so important to Him: love me.  And I'm so glad --and blessed!--that he does.)

Is my love for God any less important, that I would not utilize IN THE RIGHT SENSE, any helps to keep it foremost?

"Systems" or "formulas" are not the enemy. Relying on them is. 

Pursue the One in whom all joy is found. HE is worthy!